It is under less than ideal circumstances that I reveal to you, suddenly and without prompting, like unto the wiles of a run of the mill sex offender, the ephemeral fruits of our misbegotten labors: behold our Super Bowl advertisement.
I say "less than ideal" because, regrettably, our modest communique did not see its glorious debut aloft the moribund effuse of the Air's eminent waves. The exact machinations that set this tragedy in motion we cannot know, but we can infer with little uncertainty that it had something (read: everything) to do with the decidedly un-sportsmanly manner in which we delivered our message. It would seem that disembodied, animalistic braying and ominous encroaching thunderclaps are less than ideal companions to the average Joe's atmosphere of bacchanal.
For me the greatest disappointment isn't merely in the stymieing of our self promotion, but the lack of advance notification; a correspondence clearly codifying the network's philosophical opposition to our product would have been a much easier manner in which to swallow this particular pill. Additionally, it would have been a fun sort of thing to print, frame and utilize as the first subject in my personal collection of such "endorsements." (Joining it in the future, hopefully, would be a cease and desist from Adam Sandler or his lawyers- apropos my persistent and fanciful positing that the former's having a heart attack would automatically constitute comedy gold.)
Anyway, the Games have come and gone- now but a forgotten effluvia in the annals of entertainment history, and we remained wholly uninvolved in the event. Thus do we proceed through our Year of the Nihilist more or less as expected: crestfallen and, in Nick's case, combating a terrifying series of vivid auditory hallucinations, convinced at all times that bees are upon him.
Oh well, you can't win 'em all! But really, if anyone knows of a kind of medicine that makes you stop thinking that you are beset upon by bees that don't exist, please send us a link or something.
Showing posts with label ad. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ad. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Read About Tornadoes
With a new year comes a new, terrifying ocean of opportunities for failure to jump you like a gunsel in the night.
Appropriately enough 2012 shall present itself as the year of the Nihilist. We'll someday soon premier Harold, a character from the dark, doom-addled recesses of our minds who contends with the pressures of proselytization in the new decade, matters of economic import, and the stark inevitability of the destruction of all things good and pure in the world.
With Harold, we have on display a small sampling of what I call the Greater Gayness and Sadness Theorem. That being, that the world we inhabit is directed by twin forces of gayness and sadness, and these are the influences that color the majority of events on this planet and beyond. It's a bit like Yin and Yang, only the relationships between these forces and the state of things can be summarized more succinctly: any event that is sad or wrong or generally disagreeable to the sensibilities of decent folk can be chalked up to the basic nature of the universe at large.
Don't mistake this for simple cynicism, mind. The Greater Gayness and Sadness Theorem does not contend that good things are impossible; indeed such anomalies are well accounted for. Consider the phenomena of a cyclone, where opposing air currents will wrap over and around each other to create a whirling vortex, in the center of which is found a spot of perfect calm. Similarly, when the natural forces of the universe find themselves situated in perfect counterpoint, there is in the midst of their turmoil an 'eye '. With the evils of reality held- however briefly- at bay, such feelings as joy, love and general satisfaction are able to be experienced unabated, as the storm-tossed sea of Despair roils unceasingly 'round us.
However, like the noble dust devil, such occurrences are few and fleeting indeed, and ere long the natural order is reinstated. The best one can do is recognize the signs and seize the opportunity to enjoy your time in the Eye's midst so long as you may, and if possible, try to move along in your life in such a way that you might yet keep apace of it a while, until the inexorable Despair overtakes you again.
We also kill a gnome. We kill a gnome in one of our "stories."
Another recent development of relative import to our diminutive enterprise has been the production of an ad- per the parlance, that is, a Super Bowl ad.
I should probably qualify this seemingly audaciously false proclamation with the esoteric insight that said ad is made, free of commission, to be aired on Air Force Network Korea's mirror broadcast of the Games in conjunction with the live event back stateside. So, not quite the kind of full-blown exposure would have been to be had from the more traditional venue, but still an exciting prospect is that of a much wider-reaching exposure than reddit alone, with the added benefit of probably being about as much of an outreach as we really warrant with our current workmanlike, but admittedly crude production quality.
Besides this, producing an "amusing" commercial to feature in any capacity during this thing is s much a staple of American culture as surely are cookouts, frivolous lawsuits and police brutality.
The real challenge was to generate something that would be deemed suitable by the venerable Everyman to be fit for general broadcast- in stark contrast to our usual fare. (Members of our modest following might note that our most viewed skit is 100% about crediting Satan- who is the antichrist- for the successful congregation of neighbor and stranger alike on our more tender and intimate of holidays.)
So, basically, though any reference to our Super Bowl ad should really be printed with a substantially emboldened asterisk astride it, it's fascinating to think that we have successfully infiltrated the airwaves of old media with news of our terrible trade. It was also a fun challenge; naturally anything for TV would be hard to do because everything we ever think of as fertile comedy soil is colored in our twin hues of sadness or gayness- see again the opening paragraph- and we're interested to see what impact if any this will have on our viewership population.
As for the ad itself, our loyal fiend Ruggles was the brainparent of the entity that will (fate willing) grace the television screens of many a stunned captive audience member in the near future- though I do not want to spoil its contents here before the air date. (Whenever the hell the Super Bowl is.) There were however a few other ideas generated, among which this and one other idea were determined to be ideal candidates.
The one that didn't make the cut- due primarily to time constraints- featured a board room executive importuning a room full of lifeless dolls for innovative marketing concepts- all while complaining of some phantom heat source. Our final ad message was to be splayed across the screen as his tremulous pleading for answers faded to silence, an ominous humming audible throughout. You know, comedy!
Another idea I came up with today (though not necessarily for an ad, but I like to think in an alternate universe it would have made for a delightful run indeed) features a vampire scoffing at a crucifix held aloft by his would-be vanquisher, declaring that he fears only "real Gods"- only then to be terminated by an errant Tiki statue. I am resolv'd to make this idea a reality, worked into some glorious larger context, ideally, but ILM hasn't been taking my calls and I simply cannot manage without realistic face melting effects.
Appropriately enough 2012 shall present itself as the year of the Nihilist. We'll someday soon premier Harold, a character from the dark, doom-addled recesses of our minds who contends with the pressures of proselytization in the new decade, matters of economic import, and the stark inevitability of the destruction of all things good and pure in the world.
With Harold, we have on display a small sampling of what I call the Greater Gayness and Sadness Theorem. That being, that the world we inhabit is directed by twin forces of gayness and sadness, and these are the influences that color the majority of events on this planet and beyond. It's a bit like Yin and Yang, only the relationships between these forces and the state of things can be summarized more succinctly: any event that is sad or wrong or generally disagreeable to the sensibilities of decent folk can be chalked up to the basic nature of the universe at large.
Don't mistake this for simple cynicism, mind. The Greater Gayness and Sadness Theorem does not contend that good things are impossible; indeed such anomalies are well accounted for. Consider the phenomena of a cyclone, where opposing air currents will wrap over and around each other to create a whirling vortex, in the center of which is found a spot of perfect calm. Similarly, when the natural forces of the universe find themselves situated in perfect counterpoint, there is in the midst of their turmoil an 'eye '. With the evils of reality held- however briefly- at bay, such feelings as joy, love and general satisfaction are able to be experienced unabated, as the storm-tossed sea of Despair roils unceasingly 'round us.
However, like the noble dust devil, such occurrences are few and fleeting indeed, and ere long the natural order is reinstated. The best one can do is recognize the signs and seize the opportunity to enjoy your time in the Eye's midst so long as you may, and if possible, try to move along in your life in such a way that you might yet keep apace of it a while, until the inexorable Despair overtakes you again.
We also kill a gnome. We kill a gnome in one of our "stories."
Another recent development of relative import to our diminutive enterprise has been the production of an ad- per the parlance, that is, a Super Bowl ad.
I should probably qualify this seemingly audaciously false proclamation with the esoteric insight that said ad is made, free of commission, to be aired on Air Force Network Korea's mirror broadcast of the Games in conjunction with the live event back stateside. So, not quite the kind of full-blown exposure would have been to be had from the more traditional venue, but still an exciting prospect is that of a much wider-reaching exposure than reddit alone, with the added benefit of probably being about as much of an outreach as we really warrant with our current workmanlike, but admittedly crude production quality.
Besides this, producing an "amusing" commercial to feature in any capacity during this thing is s much a staple of American culture as surely are cookouts, frivolous lawsuits and police brutality.
The real challenge was to generate something that would be deemed suitable by the venerable Everyman to be fit for general broadcast- in stark contrast to our usual fare. (Members of our modest following might note that our most viewed skit is 100% about crediting Satan- who is the antichrist- for the successful congregation of neighbor and stranger alike on our more tender and intimate of holidays.)
So, basically, though any reference to our Super Bowl ad should really be printed with a substantially emboldened asterisk astride it, it's fascinating to think that we have successfully infiltrated the airwaves of old media with news of our terrible trade. It was also a fun challenge; naturally anything for TV would be hard to do because everything we ever think of as fertile comedy soil is colored in our twin hues of sadness or gayness- see again the opening paragraph- and we're interested to see what impact if any this will have on our viewership population.
As for the ad itself, our loyal fiend Ruggles was the brainparent of the entity that will (fate willing) grace the television screens of many a stunned captive audience member in the near future- though I do not want to spoil its contents here before the air date. (Whenever the hell the Super Bowl is.) There were however a few other ideas generated, among which this and one other idea were determined to be ideal candidates.
The one that didn't make the cut- due primarily to time constraints- featured a board room executive importuning a room full of lifeless dolls for innovative marketing concepts- all while complaining of some phantom heat source. Our final ad message was to be splayed across the screen as his tremulous pleading for answers faded to silence, an ominous humming audible throughout. You know, comedy!
Another idea I came up with today (though not necessarily for an ad, but I like to think in an alternate universe it would have made for a delightful run indeed) features a vampire scoffing at a crucifix held aloft by his would-be vanquisher, declaring that he fears only "real Gods"- only then to be terminated by an errant Tiki statue. I am resolv'd to make this idea a reality, worked into some glorious larger context, ideally, but ILM hasn't been taking my calls and I simply cannot manage without realistic face melting effects.
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